Daughter's Eulogy

Monday, June 18, 2012

Happy Flag Day

June 14 is Flag Day, but this day is also my birthday.  I wanted to spend my birthday with both of my moms since I have not had both of them together for my birthday for over 30 years.

The morning started out with a phone call from Mom Lentz to wish me a Happy Birthday. She has never forgotten my birthday. Even though Mom Lentz is recuperating in The Community*, I had no doubt she would remember. On the other hand, Mom Mascitti has not remembered my birthday in years.  Yet this year was different because I understood why Mom Mascitti would not remember and I was OK.  Mom Mascitti does not even talk on the phone any longer.

On Wednesday, I chose to make two dozen cupcakes to bring to share with my moms and the nursing staff at The Community*. I wanted to celebrate my birthday with both of them.   

On Thursday, I went to see Mom Lentz.  She was happy to see me, but, she was not able to eat a cupcake due to her diabetes.  She was told that eating sugar delays her healing so she is trying to give up sweets entirely while she is recovering from her surgery. After spending some time with Mom Lentz, I proceeded upstairs to see Mom Mascitti and share a cupcake with her.

She was in the activity room where a group of residents were watching the Match Game.  Mom’s head was bobbing; I knew she was dozing off even though the back of her wheelchair was facing me.   I set up a table for two in the back of the room for mom and me. I went up behind mom and started to wheel her backwards towards the table.

 She woke up and said, “Is it time to go? 

“Hi mom, look it’s me.  I brought you something special.”

“Where did you get all those cupcakes?”

“I made them for my birthday.”

“Julienne, I did not remember,” as she sadly put her head down. 

“Mom I am not here to make you feel bad.  I wanted to celebrate my birthday with you.  I am here to eat some cupcakes.  Look I brought special Flag Day napkins and paper plates just like we have done on my past birthdays.”

“Julienne, you did not have to go through all this trouble”.

“I know, mom, I wanted to.”

“These cupcakes are really good.  Why did you bring so many cupcakes?”

“I wanted to share them with your nurses and Mom Lentz’s nurses.”

“Let me tell you who should get one.”

“You decide mom and I will take the rest to Mom Lentz’s nurses.”

Mom and I had a very nice, but short visit as bingo was going to start.  Mom told me she was happy to celebrate my birthday.  She once again told me that she loved me from the bottom of her heart. I knew that I would cherish this birthday party with mom for the rest of my life. I just could not pass up a chance to celebrate with mom because my guess is this birthday will be our last together. 

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