Merry Christmas, Mom

Ron and I arrived at The Community* to find that they are still under quarantine.  Everyone visiting and all employees must wear face masks no exceptions.  I headed to the restroom to warm my hands under hot water so I could hold mom’s hands without her flinching.

When Ron and I saw mom, her eyes lit up and she said, “You came.”  She looked extremely tired and weak as if all the life has been drained from her.

“Mom, my surgery went well.  Look I am even walking without crutches already.”

“Good,” she nodded.

“Mom, Julienne made you a very special Christmas gift.  She made you a video of your entire life,” Ron said.  Ron wheeled mom over to a table in the activities room where he set the video up for us to watch.

Mom mumbled.  We had no idea what she said.  The more she mumbled the closer I moved to hear as if moving closer would help me understand.

When the video started Ron said, “Mom, who is that beautiful little girl.  She is a beautiful young girl now.”  Ron kept commenting as the video kept rolling along.

‘I was sad . . .  when young,” mom said.

“Mom, look at that good-looking couple,” Ron was talking about mom and dad’s wedding photos.

“Don’t remember,” mom said.

“I am sure your wedding is hard to remember.  Your wedding was a long time ago.  I can barely remember my wedding,” I said.

“Wow!” she shook her head again.

 “Mom, you’ve touched a lot of people’s lives,” I said.   The entire time we watched the video mom and I held hands. 

Mom kept mumbling.   “I kept telling her I know how hard it is for her not to be able to express herself.” 

The video kept rolling.   Ron and I kept talking to her about the people in the photos to help her remember.  Throughout watching the video mom kept closing her eyes saying, “I feel like . . .  crying.”  Although she did not cry it seemed like she wished she could.

“Mom, these are happy pictures so I hope your tears would be tears of joy,” I said.

She shook her head. 

When the video was over, mom hugged, kissed and told us both that she loved us. 

I said, “Mom was the video a good Christmas gift.”

“Gorgeous.” Mom said as clear as day.   When I was growing up mom’s highest compliment she could give was saying something was ‘gorgeous”.  So I knew she was pleased.

The three of us all held each other’s hands while we said our prayers.

“Mom, I love you with my whole heart, Merry Christmas.” I said while I squeezed her again.

“My whole heart too,” mom said.

All three of us blew kisses. 

I know some of mom’s life has been difficult.  But watching all the memories go by, I realized mom has had many beautiful moments throughout her life; the world would not have been the same without her.  God knows that neither I nor my brothers would be here without her and for that I will always be grateful.