Life is a Group Effort

While I was at The Community* on Thursday, I left a message for Dana*, mom's hospice nurse, to please look at mom’s left foot when she visits her on Friday.  I informed her that mom is on Lasix, but her foot and ankle is still badly swollen. 

On Friday Dana* called to give me an update after looking at mom’s foot and ankle.  She agreed that mom’s left foot is very swollen.  Dana* spoke with mom’s regular nurse who in turn spoke with mom’s doctor.   He prescribed doubling mom’s Lasix for three days starting on Friday. 

 

Lasix is a loop diuretic (water pill) that prevents the body from absorbing too much salt, allowing the salt to instead be passed in the urine.  Lasix treats fluid retention (edema) in people with congestive heart failure which mom was diagnosed with several months ago.

The negative with taking extra lasix is that mom will need to stay close to the restroom for the next three days.  Dana made sure to inform mom of this side effect.

In addition, the doctor is also going to give mom a blood test to check her levels of potassium.  If she is low, he will start supplementing her with potassium. 

Hopefully, mom’s swollen foot and ankle problem should soon be rectified.

The Abyss of Aging

Yesterday, I visited mom.  She looked good.  We sat mostly just holding hands.  One of her favorite things for me to do for her is to rub hand lotion on her hands.  The transition in her hands is remarkable.  She describes her hands before the lotion goes on, “Just like sandpaper.”  But after I apply the lotion and rub her hands she smiles and says, “They feel nice.”  I try to remember to do this each and every time I visit because I know although this seems like such a small gesture, her hands feeling good is a big deal to her. 

I asked her if she would like to escort me to her room so I could go and hang up her red jacket that I had washed and brought back.  I try to have her walk a little each time I am there to see how she is doing.  I asked her if she was in any pain and she said no.

When I opened her closet doors, I noticed that someone had added two more packages of adult diapers on top of her closet making the total now four packages of adult diapers.  I immediately checked the sizes and fortunately both additional packages were medium.  The weird thing is mom now has 80 diapers on her top shelf again.  I guess the good news is that they are all her size.

We walk back to our favorite lounge chairs, mom sits on the small one and I sit on the bigger one.  Just like the story of the Three Bears both chairs seem to fit us perfectly. 

 

Mom asks me to take her sock off her left foot.  I had been told that mom’s feet are swelling but her left foot looked downright painful. 

I called her nurse who looked at her foot and said, “We are giving her lasix for the swelling.” 

I answered, “Is mom safe to walk on this foot?” 

Her nurse shook her head saying, “Yes.” 

“I just wonder if mom would not be safer or more comfortable in a wheelchair.” 

“We try to keep everyone walking as long as possible.  Gilda, is it painful to walk?”  Mom shook herself no.

“Mom, would you rather be in a wheelchair?  Would that be easier for you?”

“No, I won’t be able to go to the washroom by myself.”

 

I left thinking that the walker is another form of independence, and taking the walker away from mom is another step in the abyss of aging.  Mom does not want to take that step.  At least not right now.



Just like this photo, doing the right thing for mom is unclear.

 

 

 

A Perfect Sweetest Day

Last Sunday when Ron and I went to visit mom we found her feeling and looking much better than previously last Thursday.  On our way to see her we noticed that the ice cream parlor was open.  I asked mom if she had a taste for ice cream that Ron would go and bring each of us back a cone.  She suggested we all go for a walk, so we did.  Once we had our cones, we sat in the Garden Room while we ate them. 

Ron and I talked about seeing Michael yesterday when we went to his soccer game.  I showed her the picture of Michael that we took at his game.  She was sorry to hear that Michael had broken his nose and two front teeth during one of his games.  We said Michael looks great now.  He is doing fine; she smiled and shook her head, “Good”.



On our way back as we passed mom’s room, I slipped in mom’s room to find another top for mom to wear so I could take her soiled jacket home to wash.  Mom said, “I really like that jacket.” 

“I will bring the red jacket next time I see you mom.”

 

While selecting a red sweater for mom, I noticed there was an additional package of adult diapers.   I glanced at the package and saw that the size was large.  Not again.  Although mom still had her two packages of medium diapers from last Thursday that she has been wearing, I was confused how these additional adult diaper packages keep finding their way to mom’s top shelf.  I immediately grabbed the size large and brought them to the nurses’ station when we walked back there. 

I talked to mom’s nurse because mom mentioned she had not been sleeping well.  I asked if there was something they could give mom to help her sleep. Her nurse was going to check with mom’s doctor on Monday morning.  When I turned my head, Ron was making mom laugh.  We stayed a while,  hugged and kissed and left.



On the way home, Ron and I stopped at the grocery store.  This day was the most fun I have had in the grocery store.  Due to my air boot, I drove one of those driving grocery carts.  Ron thought I was going to take down a display in my efforts to shop, but I proved him wrong.



Once we left Ron made a surprise stop at one of my favorite places, Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory where he returned to our car with a mummy taffy apple made of white chocolate and peanut butter. 

 

Visiting Mom, going grocery shopping and eating a Mummy Taffy Apple . . . a perfect Sweetest Day.

Bittersweet

 

Yesterday after visiting the foot surgeon’s office, I went to visit mom.  The day before I had spoken with her hospice nurse who informed me that mom is anxious to see me.   I promised that I would be visiting after my doctor’s appointment.

Upon seeing mom, Ron and I were both so happy to be with her.  Walking with crutches through the long corridors in The Community* was a nice, but exhausting workout.   I plopped myself down on one of their reclining chairs while Ron escorted mom from the activity room to another recliner right next to me.  We were both elated and relieved to see each other.  We hugged tightly.

“Mom, I missed you.”

“I really missed you.  I was so worried,” mom said.

I showed mom the pictures I had just taken of my ankle with the stitches.  Shaking her head saying, “I prayed:  Dear God . . . heal my daughter.”

“Thank you, mom, God heard you.  I am doing great.”

“Ron took good care of me.”

Mom turned to Ron and said,  “I have no doubt”.



Our conversation for the next hour was completely a mishmash of words.  Mom started trying to tell me several different things, however she would only say two of three words and she would lose her thought.   I tried so hard to guess or fill in the blanks, but I was unsuccessful more times than not.  She kept saying the words ‘frustrating’ and ‘difficult’.

 I held mom’s hands and assured her that I understood how frustrating not being able to communicate and form her thoughts must be.   I kept telling mom how proud of her I was at how she is handling everything.  Discouraged, but positive mom said, “I’m trying.”

While holding mom’s hands I noticed they were freshly manicured.  “Mom your nails look beautiful.”

“Shirley did them today. She cut them, too.”

“They look so nice mom can I take a picture of them?” 

 

“Sure.”

The reason I take so many pictures of every little thing with mom is that mom feels special.  She absolutely loves looking at the photos with me.  She loves to choose which one she likes and I delete the ones she does not care for.  This is something her and I do together.  The photos are kind of magical; they actually seem to pick up her spirits.

In mom’s several attempts at conversation, I picked up that she wanted me to go to her room and work on her closet.  She had a problem she wanted me to fix.  In the past there have been several different issues that mom has wanted addressed whether it is missing nightgowns, shoes, or adult diapers.

As Ron seemed to race towards mom’s room, mom and I ‘slowly but surely’ with our apparatus made it  to her room.  I joked with mom saying, “Mom, you can walk faster than me.  I am having a hard time catching up to you.” 

She laughed, her head bounced like a bobble head doll, “Right now.”

 

On our way I said, “Tomorrow Jamie will be taking you to the beauty shop to have your hair done.”

Mom stopped and angrily said, “No, you’re wrong. I did it on Tuesday.”

“Mom, I bet you’re thinking about a shower.  Did you have a shower on Tuesday?”

“Yes, I did.”

I dropped talking about the beauty salon. I did not want to confuse mom anymore than she already was today.  Mom forgot about it. too.

When I opened the closet, she pointed to the top shelf stuffed with several packages of adult diapers and shouted, “Check!”

Five bags of adult diapers were on top shelf.  I grabbed a bag and noticed the size to be large.  Looking at all the others quickly, I noticed there were 3 bags of large diapers, one bag of extra-large diapers, and one bag of small diapers.  No wonder mom’s frustrated.  They are either too small or way too big.  Mom wears a medium.  Mom has had this issue before where someone gave her the wrong size diaper.  I have reported this issue before to mom’s hospice nurse and aide who at that time handled the problem for me. 

You can imagine how uncomfortable mom is not wearing the right size.  The small is obviously too tight for mom while the large have too much padding between her legs making her miserable. 

While I was straightening and organizing all of mom’s hanging clothes, I found two huge bags of medium diapers hiding underneath her clothes. I find this inexcusable!  Mom has a hard time explaining to anyone about the problem because she becomes so confused. She knew the size was wrong, but she was unable to communicate that effectively or no one was listening.  Mom has enough to deal with her dementia.

 The diaper situation is so unnecessary.  I have to wonder why someone would keep stuffing 7 bags of diapers, 5 of them the wrong size into her closet.  Each bag has 20 diapers per bag.  I could see how mom would be so frustrated and helpless.  Every time I am with mom which has normally been at least twice a week, I check her closet so I know this happened in the last 8 days.  None of my family would have even known to check for this problem that has occurred before because I always take double check everything in mom’s closet on every visit.   

The hospice social worker had followed us to the room.  Earlier when she first saw mom, Ron and I, she asked mom if mom felt good because mom’s color did not look good.  This was true.  Mom’s coloring today seemed to be yellow-toned almost jaundice.  Mom has been on antibiotics because a week ago they thought she was coming down with the flu.

I told her of mom’s diaper problem.  I handed all the wrong size bags of diapers to her. “Please remove them from her room now so mom is not given the wrong ones to wear.”  She was very accommodating; she was confused herself why mom would have all these bags of diapers.  She assured me that she would look into this further. 

I will inform my brothers what to look for to make sure this issue does not bother mom again. 

Mom felt like a load was lifted off her shoulders.  Someone finally understood.  “I am sorry, mom, that I was not here to help you.  I am so sorry this was so frustrating for you.  We will make sure that does not happen again.”  Mom imitated a bobble-head again and faintly smiled.

“Mom, it is 4 o’clock almost time for your dinner.   Let’s go back to the chairs we were sitting on before.”

Once mom was resting comfortably, I suggested she raise her legs up because her ankles are swollen again.  She said, “I can’t get down myself.”  I told her to call for help if she needed to go to the restroom or wanted to lower her feet.    Since the time was so close to dinnertime, I assured her that they would be coming to escort her into the dining room soon.  Just then one of mom’s favorite aides walked by, mom said, “He’s fantastic.”

“Who is he?”  She pointed to Barb*, a very pretty female aide. 

“Mom, Barb* is a female who just has short hair.”

“What’s his name?”

“Her name is Barb*.”   Just then Barb* stopped by and said to me, “Gilda never remembers my name.  She always calls me a he, but she is a good person.”

“I’m so sorry, mom is confused.  I keep telling her your name, but your name is not penetrating in her brain.”

“I know . . . don’t worry; she is not hurting my feelings,” Barb* said.

“My mom just said you are fantastic.”

“Thank you, Gilda, you are my friend.”

“Yes, I love you,” mom told Barb*.

As I move closely to mom to give her a hug and kiss, she hugged me tighter than normally. 

 

“Mom, I love you.  I missed you so much.”

“I love you a million-fold.”  She turned to Ron and said, “You, too, a million-fold.”

Ron laughed saying, “Well, mom, I love you a million-fold too.”

During the next few minutes, mom wanted another kiss and hug.  We started to both laugh.  “How many hugs and kisses do we need today?”

Mom smiled, “OK, one more.”

“OK, mom, I will see you again soon.  I am really tired.  My leg is starting to bother me.”

“OK, I’ll let you go.”

I remembered that the hospice social worker had asked me to see her on my way out.  So I went by the nurses’ desk where she was sitting.  “I just wanted to check if you have made funeral arrangements for your mom and which funeral home she will be going to.”

My heart raced.  “Are you telling me her time is near,” trying to hold back tears.

“No, I just wasn’t sure if we had the information,” as she grabbed my hands knowing by the look on my face that she had scared me half to death.

“Please tell me the truth, I want to make mom comfortable and I want to spend quality time with her.”

“You are.  Your mom is OK.”

With that, I glanced back at mom.  We blew each other kisses and smiled.

 

I left praying that God would be gentle with mom.

Taking the Next Step

Today was a good news day when I went to see my foot surgeon. They removed my foot monstrosity as demonstrated in previous blogs.  I dreamed about seeing my ankle, giving the entire leg a chance to breathe, and rubbing my leg with moisturizer.  All of the above happened just as I thought except my incision was much larger than I imagined.  Underneath all the padding was an ankle looking much different than prior to the surgery.  

After having my stitches removed, I was fitted for an air walking boot which is pretty remarkable.  When the air is activated, the boot conforms to my foot and ankle, making sure my foot feels safe and comfortable.   This boot will allow me to start putting weight on my foot in the next few days.  Although I am still on crutches, I will be able to bathe without the boot which is definitely an answered prayer.  

Even though physical therapy will not take place for four more weeks, my doctor’s orders were to remove boot 5-6 times per day and draw the alphabet with my toes each day before an icing treatment to reduce swelling.   What he instructed me to do was to take my time and not over do.  Fortunately, I will still be on pain medication and Ibuprofen to eliminate swelling especially in case I over do. 

Although Ron is thrilled that I will slowly start becoming more independent, no one is happier than me to go back to being a caregiver for mom instead of being cared for.  However I am thankful for Ron, my family and friends for their help and continued support.

A Special Gift

What do they say about worrying?  “Worry is like a rocking chair—it gives you something to do, but it does not get you anywhere.”

.

A week has gone by since I have seen mom.  I think about her every day.  I miss spending time with her and would love to see her. Unfortunately, my ankle has had a few complications I was not expecting.  The main occurrence is that my toes turn blue when I stand up just to walk around my home.  The doctor says, “Not to worry as long as when I raise my foot up that my normal color comes back.  The blue toes are a warning sign that I should keep my foot up as much as humanly possible during this healing stage.”  Why does that statement seem easy when they are not talking about you?

My mom gave me a special gift today. Let me explain further so you can understand where I am coming from. I have been wondering if mom is sad, mad, or just plain disappointed because I have not visited her recently.  Then the phone rings; my brother, Jamie called.  He spent some quality time with mom again today.  Mom asked Jamie how I was feeling.  Jamie shared what has been happening to my foot.  He informed mom of my plans to try and visit her tomorrow.   Mom said, “Tell Julienne to take care of herself.  I know she loves me. I want her to feel better.” 

Her words mean so much to me; they were the best gift I could have received. Mom never knew how much I always loved her, but she does now even when I cannot be there for her. 

 I know mom loves me, too.

A Bump in the Night

  
 

Early Monday morning, I received a call from The Community*.  Mom had slipped and fallen in the middle of the night. She attempted to get out of her bed and go to the washroom without pressing the button for assistance.  As she fell backwards, she hit her head.

Mom’s bed has an alarm that sounded when mom moved off her bed, but the aides that were working at night were not close by. They were helping other residents.

Initially she had a bump on her head that night which seemed to disappear by morning.  Mom had bruised her elbows and also was complaining that her right knee and leg hurt.  Her nurse scheduled mom for an x-ray.

Later that morning, I received another call about mom’s condition. This time the call was from Dana*, mom’s hospice nurse. Mom had asked Dana* to call me to see how my surgery went and how I was feeling.  I informed Dana* on all the details of my surgery, but suggested she tell my mom that I was doing well.  Since mom does not want to talk on the phone, I mentioned to Dana* that I was going to try and visit mom later that day.

I asked Ron to take me to see mom to make sure she was OK.  We used mom’s wheelchair transporter to help me since I could not have kept my foot down while walking on crutches for that long of a period of time yet.
 

When we arrived, mom was sitting in a huge comfortable chair with her eyes closed.  Ron parked my transporter right in front of her.  I watched her for a few moments then I held mom’s hands.  When she opened her eyes, she smiled.  She was surprised to see me so soon. 

 

I told her I wanted to see how she was feeling.  I asked her if she pushed the button to call for assistance when she had to use the toilet.  She said, "What button?"  Mom must have woken up disoriented.  Understandably, mom still seemed shaken up today and disoriented.  I notice that some days I see more signs of dementia in mom than other days.     

Shortly after we arrived, we were informed the x-ray showed mom’s leg had no fractures.  Mom’s leg and knee were sore from the fall and would probably leave a bruise in the coming days.  I checked mom’s body to find that she had scrapes on her arms due to the fall which the aide had previously told me. 

 

We visited for awhile, took pictures, and then her nurse asked mom if she wanted to go to bed, but she said no.   Instead she wanted to be with the other residents in the activity room so we said our goodbyes and her aide walked mom to the activity room.


 

More Than We Expected

Last Thursday when I left mom, she wished me well on my ankle surgery that I was having on Friday.  I assured her I would be fine.  I had an MRI on my left ankle and had found out I had a ganglion cyst.  After the Podiatrist tried to aspirate the cyst and failed, the only option remaining was surgery. 

The doctor informed me that I would be in a soft cast for two weeks after the surgery.  I chose to wait till after mom’s birthday.  In addition, I made sure mom had her beauty shop appointment the day before because I wanted to make my surgery doable with less hassle for everyone including me.

Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how you look at the situation that followed.  My surgery should have been a relatively simple procedure, but the surgery became complicated. After the doctor removed a cyst the size of a golf ball on the bone of my ankle, he found two torn tendons that were literally hanging by a thread underneath the cyst.  The doctor sewed both of the tendons back together.  The doctor was amazed that no one saw the torn tendons on the MRI just recently taken.  So are we.

 

From a surgery point of view everything went well, however, I will be in a non-walking surgical cast for the next two weeks; then I will move into a soft boot cast for another four weeks; followed by physical therapy.

I certainly had not prepared for being six weeks out of commission.  Today I am looking at the doctor finding my torn tendons a blessing in disguise.  If they had completely ripped, who knows where I would have been.   I would have been rushed to the emergency room.  Instead I was sleeping peacefully when the doctor found and fixed the torn tendons.   Now comes the tough part . . . trying to be a caregiver when you need a caregiver.

What a Difference a Day Makes

Mom’s birthday was last Wednesday. She was feeling great; Ron and I had a wonderful day with mom celebrating her birthday.  So you can imagine my surprise when I went to see her on Thursday to take her to her beauty shop appointment and found mom initially disoriented, depressed, and constantly complaining.

Her dementia was really bad this day.  I had to convince her to let me take her to the beauty shop. How she could go from such a happy state to a very confused state was sadly disturbing.

From the moment she walked into Joanne’s* beauty shop till the time we left, there was no doubt from everyone who came in contact with mom, knew that her dementia was acting up today.  She was constantly asking the same two questions over and over again.  “When is my next shower? When is my next hair appointment?”  Joanne* and I both kept answering the questions each time mom asked.  She was trying our patience, but fortunately we were both calm and trying to comfort mom.

Even though mom was in bad place, I asked her if she still wanted a picture taken and she did.  Joanne* was able to make her smile and I was able to capture that smile with my camera. 

After I snapped a few photos of mom she said, “Can I see?”

“Of course, mom, you tell me which one to put in the blog?”  Here’s the photo mom selected.

Looking at this photo you would have no idea what a difficult day mom was having.

 

 

Before I left mom did remember that I was having surgery on Friday, Oct 7.  She wished me well and I told her not to worry that my surgery would be no big deal.  Little did I know . . .

Happy Birthday, Mom!

Today mom is 85 years young.  Considering everything she has been through and diagnosed with this year, mom is doing quite well.  Most importantly, mom feels much love.

She has experienced two wonderful birthday celebrations this week with her sons, daughter and respective families. 

But last week while spending quality time with mom, I asked her what she would like to do for her birthday.  Her words were “Forget about it”.   

 

I shook my head adamantly saying, “Mom, that is not going to happen.  We all want to celebrate your birthday.  How about if I cook dinner and have everyone over?” 

“No, Julienne, let’s just go out to eat; make it easy for everyone.”

Mom was definite that she did not want to go out for dinner either.  If we were taking her out, she would only agree to go out for lunch.  Aging seniors sometimes have Sundowners Syndrome which is a type of mood disorder that is often associated with people in the early stages of dementia and Alzheimer’s.  Patients experience periods of extreme agitation and confusion in the late afternoon or early evening hours which makes them have more anxiety as the sun goes down hence the illness is appropriately called ‘sundowners’ .  Mom told me she likes to get her pajamas on and be ready for bed at 6:30pm.   She finds comfort and security in her daily routine.  Far be it for us to do anything that makes mom anxious.

Mom told me several times that I was to make sure that everyone knew she did not want a balloon.  Her emphasis was that she did not want to draw attention to herself or her birthday.  I assured her that I would check with The Community’s* staff to make sure that they did not give balloons to residents on their birthday.  I was informed that they do not.  If another resident had one they must have been given the balloon by their family or friend.  Just to make sure mom was not unpleasantly surprised with a well-intentioned balloon for her birthday, I emailed my brothers’ mom’s request.

Prior to me leaving that day, mom said, “Julienne, will you bring cupcakes for the staff on my birthday.”  At first I thought if she did not want to bring attention to herself why would she want birthday cupcakes, but instead of questioning her I replied, “I’ll be happy to, mom.”

After talking with my brothers, the decision was made for my brothers and their families to celebrate mom’s birthday on the Sunday before her birthday by taking her to brunch at Algauer’s.  Ron and I chose taking mom out on her actual birthday to Red Lobster which gave mom two birthday celebrations.  

Before I left mom last Friday, I explained everything to her so she would not be surprised.  She commented, “I wish this holiday was over.” 

“Mom, are you talking about your birthday?”

“Yes, you guys don’t need to do anything.”

“Mom, you are going to be able to spend quality time with your family around your birthday.  I’m sure Sunday will be wonderful. ”

Prior to the brunch, I hinted to Jamie that mom was anxious about going out.  After all this is the first time she has eaten in a restaurant since she has been at the healthcare facility.  The last time she was with everyone was at Sandy’s and Pete’s for Easter.  The event was very traumatic for her.

Jamie assured me that he would seat mom between him and Jerome to make mom feel comfortable.  On Sunday, after their brunch I received a nice text from Jamie stating that brunch was a success.  Everyone, especially mom, had a great time.  I was so happy to receive the text.

Today when I visited mom she reinforced that she enjoyed being together for her birthday brunch.

After arriving at The Community* today, I stopped by the reception desk to arrange the cupcakes I had brought for the staff in celebration of mom’s birthday.  I passed out some of the cupcakes to some of the first floor staff that I saw as a walked towards the elevator knowing mom would want me to present them with a cupcake.  

 

As I stepped onto the elevator a woman with a bouquet of balloons also stepped in, I thought to myself . . . I sure hope those are not for mom.  Fortunately, when the elevator doors opened the woman turned right and I turned left.  I thought  . . . Whew that was a close call!

As I approached the nurses’ station where my mom was sitting I was greeted by many smiling staff faces.  Her nurse, Billy said, “Your mom is waiting for you.  She is very excited to be going out to lunch for her birthday.”

In my peripheral vision I could see mom sitting in her chair, she had a Happy Birthday crown on her head and a huge smile on her face.

 

“Julienne, everyone here wondered what time you were coming.  They were all waiting for the cupcakes.”

“Happy Birthday, Mom.  It is only 11am.  Here are the cupcakes; I brought chocolate and vanilla.”

“Do you think you brought enough cupcakes?” 

“Mom, I have two platters-a total of 40 cupcakes.”

“OK, Julienne, I guess you know.   Where’s Ron?  I told everyone he was coming too.”

“He is going to meet us at Red Lobster.”

Then, Dana, mom’s hospice nurse came over and gave mom a card and you guessed it a balloon.   Mom said, “Oh no, not a balloon.  I don’t want it.”

 

“Dana, I am sorry I forgot to tell you that mom did not want a balloon.”

“I almost bought her a plant and then I chose a balloon,” Dana said sadly.

“Mom, why don’t we leave your balloon at the nurses’ station?  Then everyone can enjoy it.”

“Yes, I agree,” mom gave a sigh of relief while all of the staff around us all laughed.

 

"Julienne, I don't want to wear this crown in the restaurant."

 

"No problem, let's put the crown in your room."  When we went to mom's room, we put the crown on her bear.

 

When we arrived at Red Lobster, Ron was waiting for us in his car.  Mom was happy to see him.  “You guys didn’t have to do this.”

“Happy Birthday, Mom.”

Mom knew exactly what she wanted, “I told everyone I was having lobster for lunch.”

“Mom, I know you like shrimp also.  How about the Seaport shrimp and lobster platter?”

“Great!”

Due to the size of the platter, Mom and I split.  She ate more than half the platter saying, “I remember the food tasting differently.”

“Mom, as we all get older our taste buds change.  Did you enjoy the meal?”

“Yes, you are both wonderful.”

Five of the wait staff at the Red Lobster came up to our table and sang Happy Birthday.  In addition, they presented mom with a Red Lobster menu with the words Happy Birthday from the Red Lobster.  Mom loved it!!!

 

“This is the second time today, people sang Happy Birthday to me.”

“What was the first?”

“Shirley*(the activity director) had everyone sing when she gave me the crown.”

“Mom, you’ve had quite a birthday. “

“I’m exhausted.”

Arriving back at The Community* mom was excited to show everyone her card/menu from The Red Lobster and tell them what she ate.  I showed mom that there were still a few cupcakes left.  I asked her if she wanted one, but she was too full.  However, mom wanted me give the rest to some of the residents so I did.  

As I left I said, “Mom, I hope you had a nice birthday.”

“I did.  I shared it with my family.”

Just then, two of mom’s close friends, Angie and Eleanor, surprised her by stopping by to wish her a Happy Birthday.  Mom asked me to open their cards and read them to her.  They also brought candy which mom said she would share with everyone at The Community.  After a few minutes, Mom saw the other residents being wheeled in to play Bingo.  It was almost 2PM.  Mom thanked them for coming, but said she had to go.  They graciously understood. They walked out with me. 

 

Although mom initially wanted us to ignore her birthday, she had two wonderful celebrations. I believe she loved every minute.