(As I stood at the podium with tears in my eyes and mom at
my side, I started my eulogy with a joke to put me and everyone else at ease.)
Have you
ever seen a miracle? If I can read this
without crying, that would be a MIRACLE!! If not, I am wearing waterproof makeup, hopefully it doesn’t fail me.
1. Mom’s education only went to the
eighth grade. She was forced to quit school and go to work at a steel company
to help support her family. She brought every single paycheck home to her
father and mother.
2. Mom told me growing up that she was
the Black Sheep of the family. She was
the Ugly Duckling. Mom you may have felt
that way, but you were neither the Black Sheep nor the Ugly Duckling.
3. Mom never thought she was pretty and
yet, mom, I thought you were beautiful.
4. Mom was an artist. Does anybody know who Brenda Starr is? Mom did.
Brenda Starr is one of the longest running comic strip characters. Mom was a great cartoonist as a
teenager. We have displayed her work tonight
and hope you have had a chance to see her sketching. Mom came from very humble beginnings. Her family did not recognize her
talents. Unfortunately mom stopped
sketching as a young teenager, but her sketching has been preserved.
5. Mom married dad when she was 24 which
was late for girls in those days. Mom made a stunning bride.
6. Mom creativity never stopped. After mom and dad married, she turned her
creativity into knitting and crocheting sweaters and afghans, but how many
people know that mom crocheted me a gorgeous bedspread that I have never taken
off my bed but to clean it.
7. Mom also knitted and crocheted
beautiful sweaters and vests for me that I have hung around this room.
8. Mom loved to play pinochle. Whether
it was with our aunts and uncles growing up, her ladies pinochle league,
playing with Mom and Dad Lentz in Marco or playing with the Naperville Seniors
Group. Growing up .
. . a
weekend didn’t go by without mom and dad and my aunts and uncles playing
pinochle at one of their homes.
9. Mom called my dad Wee-Gee. Mystery remains to
me: I never found out why. Wee-Gee was a far cry from dad’s tough guy
name .
. . Guido; but dad seemed to love it when mom
called him Wee-Gee.
10.Mom was a perfectionist. She ironed our pillowcases and sheets. As soon as I was tall enough to reach the
iron and the ironing board that became my job.
Mom would have me re-iron the pillowcases if they weren’t perfect until
my work met with her standards. She
would also make me dust baseboards and ledges of doors every week.
A little secret mom doesn’t know:
I have never dusted a baseboard or a ledge of a door since I have been
married and I never plan to. Somehow I don’t think she would be upset with me
anymore.
11.Back to another one of mom’s
perfectionist traits. It was never more
evident than when mom was baking whether it was homemade bread from scratch,
pizza from the old country, or maybe one of the finest pineapple upside down cakes
ever created. Just ask Pete or Ron who
makes the best pineapple upside down cake, in addition, to the prettiest one.
12.Mom was never satisfied. I guess that’s a true perfectionist. She always believed things could be
better.
13.Mom was emotional. She would cry when she was happy or sentimental. My brothers and I have that trait, too. My brothers and I call it ‘Gilda-ism’ and Ron
called it ‘Gilda-itis). Mom laughed
whenever we talked about it.
14.Mom loved the color purple. Back in the 60s mom had our entire home
carpeted with deep purple carpeting.
Little did she know that deep purple carpeting showed every speck of
dust or fuzz so we had to vacuum every day?
15.Mom was superstitious. Growing up she had a small salt and pepper
shaker above each door. Somewhere along the line, the salt and pepper shakers
disappeared from the tops of our doors but I don’t remember when or why.
16.Mom loved flowers. When I think of her, I remember the love she
had for red geraniums. Most of you
probably remember that our home in Chicago Heights had an enormous flower box
that always adorned red geraniums. Although my dad seemed to water them
frequently, Mom would prune them daily. If one of the pedals were dying mom
would clip them so they all looked perfect all the time. Mom, funny thing this year our house is
surrounded by geraniums and deep purple petunias. And I will think of you each and every day as
I trim and water them. I will try to
keep them perfect.
17.Mom even used her gardening skills
while she was at Tabor Hills. She loved
being in charge of watering their flowers and often showed me the container
that she planted with flowers in their lovely garden.
18.Mom was known by family and friends
as Jilda, Jill, Aunt Jill or Aunt Jilda until the last five years of her
life. At that time, she appreciated what
a great original name her parents gave her and wanted to be called ‘Gilda’ and
was adamant about it.
19. When I was young, Mom called her
kids Charlie Brown. We are not sure why
but somehow things changed later in life and we started calling mom Charlie
Brown. Maybe because she loved to read
the comics of the Sunday newspaper.
20.Mom was a food demonstrator at many
of the stores including Jewel, Dominick’s, and Target. Mom loved this job
because she would demonstrate her outgoing personality, her persuasiveness and
make friends at the same time. Sales
were high when mom was the demo lady. To
this day, I’ve never met a better one.
21.Mom was a manicurist. Till her dying bed she still loved having her
nails look nice. Looking at mom even as
she lay like an angel her nails are beautifully manicured.
22. Mom loved to have her hair
done. The hours we spent with Jennifer her
beautician at Tabor Hills Supportive Living laughing and talking were times I never
will forget.
23.Mom loved to lay and bathe in the
sun. Growing up mom and I often baked
outside together while Dad would cook and shoo away any bees from bothering us. Mom, neither of us have baked our bodies in
years, but we still enjoy being out in the sunshine together.
24.Mom was afraid of bugs. She passed that trait on to me. When the 17 year Locust came dad had to
shield mom and me as we walked to and from our house and garage. Thank goodness a locust never landed on
either of us.
25.As you may already know mom called
all of her children ‘The Joys of Her Life’ and she would cancel any plans if
one of her kids wanted to spend time with her at the same time.
26.Mom loved to go shopping so much that
dad would call the mall mom frequented as the bank. The name of the mall was Lincoln Mall.
27.Mom loved to spend time in Glenwood
with her sisters and Marlene. While us
kids were growing up life wasn’t complete unless we visited at least once a
week. Many weeks she was there several
times.
28.Mom loved sausage. She loved it grilled to perfection. Jerome, Jamie, and Ron knew that perfection
meant burning the sausage. And they never
let her down. Mom knew they all went out
of their way to make her happy.
29.Mom loved chicken wings. Mom was not happy until she made her chicken
wing bones shine. She would remind me
that when she was growing up they had so little to eat that they would not
waste a thing. Initially, she was upset that I never cleaned my chicken bones
as good as her, but she often cleaned my chicken bones after I was finished
saying, “I left the best part.”
Ron cleans the bones like mom did that was something they both had in
common and would both make fun of me not following in their good examples.
30.Mom loved to bake homemade bread. We loved smelling her bread permeating
throughout the house. Many days she made
her homemade spaghetti sauce at the same time.
Nothing was better than putting her gravy on her homemade bread. When I envision her bread and gravy, I still
receive the satisfying feeling I had eating this delicious treat.
31.Although mom was a perfectionist, she
always burnt one loaf of bread for herself.
She loved burnt bread and we always let her eat that whole loaf.
32.Mom loved being helpful. She would often come and help Ron and me with
yard work. She did this up to her last
few years. She was happy to be rewarded
with one of her favorite meals that Ron would cook specially for her like
Steak, Bacon and Onions with Roasted Tomatoes.
Dad was the one who initially created this masterpiece and his recipe
will go on for generations.
33.Growing up mom loved Shafer
Lake. Mom and dad would take us there
every year along with our aunts, uncles and cousins. We would have the time of our lives.
34.Mom loved going to Marco Island. Her favorite times were while my dad was
still alive and our family would be together.
They both enjoyed and loved ‘our extended family’ there.
35.Mom always stressed the importance of
having children so much so mom offered to be a surrogate for Ron and me when we
were told we were unable to have our own children. Maybe we have seen too many soap operas, but
Ron and I could not deal with whether the child would be our son, daughter,
sister, or brother. But mom, we never
forgot your selfless gesture.
36.One of the fun things about being
around mom was having people guess her age.
Mom had great genes. Her skin was so clear and youthful looking. She had so few wrinkles that many people
would actually go through her medicine cabinet to see what she was using to
keep herself looking so good. (They told
me so.) By the way, what they found was Oil of Olay.
37.Many times at Tabor Hills people
there would ask if we were sisters. Mom
thought that was funny and laughed. I
knew how special that made mom feel and that made me very happy.
38.When any of her children split a
sandwich or even a cupcake with her, mom would think we gave her the biggest
piece and want to trade with us. She
always wanted to take care of her children first.
39.Ron gave mom a loving nickname of
PITA (which stands for Pain in the ___; you can guess what the ‘A’ stood for). Mom actually loved her nickname and would
often say Julienne was also a PITA. And
of course, Ron would agree. Mom and Ron
had a wonderful relationship although it started out rocky many years ago; they
both loved each other very much. Mom often
told me Ron was one of her favorite people.
40.When mom was still driving she loved
to go to daily mass. When she was unable
to drive she still attended every service that Tabor Hills had and attended
weekly Sunday mass at St. Thomas the Apostle.
41.In the last few months, when I would
be with mom she often said, “Julienne, you always make over me and make me feel
special!!!” Oh how times have changed
since I was a little girl and you used to dress me up in those frilly
dresses. Mom you made sure my outfit and
hair was perfect. I was paying you back
and then some.
42.Mom loved McDonalds but only one McDonald’s
location was what Mom considered ‘the REAL McDonalds’. No other location would make those double
cheeseburgers the way she liked them or so she thought.
43.Mom’s last meal was a Happy
Meal. We ate that for lunch on
Friday. Mom’s Happy Meal consisted of a
double cheeseburger and fries. And yes,
she ate every bit of her double cheeseburger.
44.Mom and I have a Blog called Mom and
Me: The Last Chapter where I journal
mom’s bought with dementia, COPD, and congestive heart failure. Our blog turned into a love story about a
daughter and her mom. I am so thankful
that mom allowed me to journal our love and past experiences and mom was so very
proud of it. This blog shows it is never
too late to repair a relationship that is so very important to you if you
really try. Our new relationship was so
important to both of us and we both treasured every moment together.
45.Mom loved her picture taken especially
in her last year and a half. I took
hundreds of photos of mom. After I took
her photo, she wanted to see it and would select the one she wanted me to put
on my blog. Even last Friday when we ate lunch.
46.When our blog was put in the
Naperville Sun along with our photo, mom took the article and showed everyone
at Tabor Hills.
48.
Mom loved the 4th of
July. She especially loved the boomers
and when they would go off she would say:
POW . . . POW .
. . POW. How appropriate mom that you wanted to celebrate
the 4th of July in Heaven; I bet there will be a lot of BOOMERS
there. When I look up in the sky on 4th
of July I will know what a great view you will have. As we look up, we know you
will be looking down at all of your children sending us your love; watching
over us and praying for us to make the most of our lives. Mom, we will always strive to make you proud
as we are proud to call you MOM. We love
you and you will be in our hearts forever.
49. Mom, you told us when we had problems
that we had a loaf of bread under each arm.
We have to pause and remember your saying when we complain. We often
don’t remember how blessed we all are with good health.
49.Mom of all your great traits and all
the wonderful things I remember about you there is one thing above all that
stands out and I personally want to
thank you for: You always had an
unwavering and special connection with Our Father in Heaven. You believed in ‘prayer’ and in going to Our
Lord with any problems. It did not
matter whether Ron and I were going through troubled times trying to have
children, or one of your children was without a job or was sick or had left the
flock. As recently as three weeks ago
when Ron went to visit mom by himself the day before his knee surgery, Mom said
to Ron I have been already praying for you, I will be praying for you tonight
and all day tomorrow. She kept praying
until just last Monday when Ron was able to go to Tabor Hills to spend some
time with mom again. She saw how good he was doing. She knew her prayers were once again
answered. And you know mom we believed
you every time you told us you were praying for us. So much so that you even asked others to pray
right along with you for your children.
We will remember how important prayer was to you all the days of your
life and on your dying bed as you tried to say the prayers along with us.
50. You have probably heard the saying
that cats have nine lives. Well, mom had
the lifespan of several cats. The number
of times in the last 15 years that we thought her life was coming to a close
was endless. Mom, God knew we both had
unfinished business we both had to take care of.
51.Mom was impatient. At the end, mom wanted to go home to Christ. In fact on Saturday when I saw her after she
had what we think was a stroke in the middle of the night. Mom said as clear as day, “C’mom.” Jamie, Ron and I were there that morning, and
understood what she meant:
“It’s time to get the show on the road.”
YOU WERE RIGHT MOM; IT DEFINITELY WAS TIME. And you deserve to spend eternity with Our
Lord as well as all your family and friends.
Mom, I know
you’re listening, and watching over us right now. I know you are pleased with all the family
and friends who are here celebrating your life.
I hope you can feel how much you are loved.
Mom, you
will be missed by many people:
But mom . . . ‘The
Joys of Your Life’ will miss you the most!!!
Guess
what? You all experienced a tiny
miracle. Mom’s spirit must have helped me read this tribute to her. Thank you, mom! We love you very much!!!
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